White lightning.

Ah, Wisconsin. A drunk guy enters a local convenience store at 3 a.m., grabs a bunch of pickled sausages, steals the donut truck parked outside, and is caught after a high-speed police chase. From the Cap Times article:

The episode began, according to the criminal complaint, when Whitelightning stumbled into the Open Pantry about 3 a.m. Saturday and went to the aisle where pickled sausages were. As the store clerk watched, Whitelightning pulled his hoodie up over his head and turned his back on the clerk, and dropped a box of the giant pickled sausages on the floor. He next took two six packs of beer and put them on the counter, then turned around. The store clerk took that opportunity to put the beer behind the counter and asked Whitelightning to leave, which he did.

No, that’s not a joke: the fellow’s name is actually Warren G. Whitelightning.
Be sure to check out the video of the chase, complete with donuts flying from the back of the open truck.

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2 thoughts on “White lightning.

  1. Man, this whole story is spectacular on so many levels. The video of the donut truck, the fact that something called “pickled sausages” exists…

  2. I knew you’d appreciate it. 😉 Personally, I kept thinking that there should be some Rainbow-style tune involving “White Lightning!” shrieked over hot lixx. Or something like that. You know, Man-on-the-Silver-Mountain-style.
    Hi-larious.

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